Lives, he lived. Timothy Hagelstein has been an abused child, a student, a ball singer, a drummer, a guitarist, a sailor in the Belgian Naval Force, an internationally successful popular artist (in group and solo) (« Mona Lisa ») notably in Portugal by a series of gold records, a composer, an editor, a producer of sound illustration music, a painter.
Behind his many « me », always the same quest, his own, buried by the weight of his past, his sufferings, his memories. His dark experiences torment him and imprison his thoughts. The rebellious living rebel turned misanthrope must free this deep depression. The prose will become a soothing placebo. « I write as I paint to forget that I exist for nothing, it is my way of detaching myself from the uselessness of life. »
« The nomad of consciousness » finds in it, « the balm of his anxieties ». With words, he relieves himself of his ills, to which he revives in a new collection of poetry and sonnets. With « Langages impossibles » he breaks his abysmal silence to echo his feelings. His ills become musical notes which he places on the score of his life. The white ones echo his passions, his hopes, the black his sufferings, his tears, the sixteenth notes his cries, his anxieties and his neuroses. The result is a melody of emotions shared in all humility by the play on words that he rhymes to discover his inner self. « Words, like stones that I nest together, words that build my sentimental home, show in the distance my soul for who can see it, form sentences that go from dusk to dawn wander in places of emotions, bring a little tenderness, questioning, wisdom to those who need it and who will come to see me and share a moment with me. »
The feather relieves his soul, his heart and his head. With her, he finds a way to express himself without speaking. By this introspection which he poses on paper, witness to his troubles, he finally shares what he has been holding back for so many years and which prevents him from living. He clears his brain battlefield. « Impossible Languages » (Pantheon Editions) is a collection of intimate secrets delivered with modesty through poetry, become an outlet for emotions, a redeemer of wandering soul and freedom of thought for the protean artist, sensitive and moving that is Timothy Hagelstein.
Visuals: © Keliann Hagelstein
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